Overheard At McGill » america

If You Can’t Remember the Date, It’s Definitely Not “Too Soon.”

tdomf_9e22f — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 03:56:29 +0000

Librarian:Â You do not have to cite general knowledge facts that everyone knows, such as that terrorists bombed the Twin Towers on September 11, 2000.

-Leacock 132

Why Does Michael Bay Get to Keep On Making Movies?

tdomf_9e22f — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 03:17:30 +0000

Prof: During the American occupation, American individuals who rewrote the Japanese Constitution made it anticonstitutional for Japan to have a standing army anywhere outside of Japan.
Girl 1: But then, how come Pearl Harbour happened??!

-Econ 335

Al Franken: The Political Years

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 00:00:48 +0000

“I got really drunk and woke up in a corn field in Minnesota.”

-the benches by Leacock

And she claims to not believe in evolution

tdomf_9e22f — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 01:39:42 +0000

Girl 1: It says here that Sarah Palin has a baby with Down’s Syndrome.
Girl 2: Oh…
Girl 1: Do you know who Sarah Palin is?
Girl 2: Yeah, she’s that woman with the huge hands, right?

-Campus

“I supported Bush, and all I got was a struggling economy and this shirt.”

overheardatmcgill — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 13:57:01 +0000

Guy 1: So I signed up for the Republican Club.
Guy 2: But you’re not Republican, are you?
Guy 1: No, but this guy was wearing a shirt I really liked. I just want the shirt.
- Lower Campus

That’s right. Another Ron Paul joke. Cry about it.

overheardatmcgill — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 03:33:09 +0000

Girl 1: Ron Paul? Isn’t he a porn star?
Girl 2: Nope, that’s Ron Jeremy.
- Outside of New Rez

Though Upstate Manhattan is a Shithole.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 18:08:47 +0000

Ditsy girl: Oh my God! New York State is, like, the coolest city in the world!
- McGill bookstore cafe

Something something Hillary, something something

overheardatmcgill — Fri, 15 Feb 2008 12:00:40 +0000

Guy 1: Well, she’s a senator.
Guy 2: She’s a woman, yeah…but she’s not stupid.
- Schulich 5th

I…really don’t know where I was going with that.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 13:38:50 +0000

American: In Canada you may have free health care, BUT in AMERICA WE HAVE SOCIAL INJUSTICE!
- Greenbriar Rez Common Room

I never let necrophobia get in the way of studying for history, or a getting laid.

overheardatmcgill — Sun, 01 Jul 2007 04:50:08 +0000

Brunette: I can’t go tomorrow night, I have to go see “JFK.”
Blonde: …But JFK’s dead! Why would you want to see him?
- Outside Werby’s on Parc

…and the mad Ivy League pussy.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 22:56:39 +0000

Professor: Now, if only I were teaching at HARVARD…
Class: OOHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Professor: No-n-No! I meant it for the MONEY!
- Leacock 132

They arenâ€™t so far offâ€¦didnâ€™t The Terminator win the election on groping?

overheardatmcgill — Wed, 30 May 2007 12:23:36 +0000

Guy 1: I heard that Carrottop is really buff now, like really huge.
Guy 2: He should start giving out random bear hugs.
Girl: Wouldn’t it be funny if movie stars just started grabbing people and yelling out the names of movies they’ve been in?
Guy 1: (Screaming and hugging himself) ”CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD! CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD!”

-BMH Caf

Rounded to the nearest hick

overheardatmcgill — Sat, 26 May 2007 14:45:53 +0000

Professor: You’d have to rely on all the books published in Mississippi, which rounded down is zero
- Class

Americans: The Canadians of Screwing.

overheardatmcgill — Wed, 09 May 2007 13:18:01 +0000

“I know everyone claims to be anti-American, but I mean, if you want to be screwed, you’d rather be screwed by the Americans than the Europeans – at least, the Americans will pay your cab fare home.”

—International Business class in Bronfman

Salad? You’ve obviously never had your poutine tossed.

overheardatmcgill — Sun, 29 Apr 2007 21:20:06 +0000

A bunch of American high-school students trying really hard to seem Quebec-legal having lunch
Student 1: Oh my God! You got a salad! That’s health food!
Student 2: It’s okay. We still love you.
Student 3: Oh my God! Salad!?! That’s so gay!

—Cafe Veranda

With Bacon.

overheardatmcgill — Sat, 14 Apr 2007 20:26:32 +0000

American Girl 1: “OMG I just had the BEST idea!”
American Girl 2 stares blankly.
American Girl 1: “You know how like we can’t like get jobs but we still like want money…”
American Girl 2: “Yeah.”
American Girl 1 (so excited she’s about to burst): “We should sell our EGGS!!!”

—American Lit. 226 (Fall 2005 hence the job comment)

Touche

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 09 Apr 2007 21:39:30 +0000

Drunk guys walking down st laurent talking about british accents
Guy: How come girls don’t like American accents?
Friends: No, they do, they do!
Guy: No they don’t, they think they’re fucking like…American.

—st. laurent

which is in New England — no, that’s all wrong, I’m certain! We must have been changed for New Rez girls!

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 03 Apr 2007 18:04:12 +0000

Girl 1: No, dude, I never knew New Jersey was in New York!
Girl 2: Yeah… I didn’t even know New Jersey was a city!!!

—Stanley and St. Caths

Tiger Woods Black or Malcolm X Black?

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 21:05:37 +0000

(The prof had spent the entire class talking about Frantz Fanon, the Algerian writer who advocated the violent overthrow of colonial France)

Girl: Um, was Fanon American?
Prof: What?
Girl: Like, was he…American? Like, African-American?
Prof: You mean… was he black?
Girl: Yeah.
Prof: … Yes.

—Poli 231

Doesn’t get any more American than wasting electricity.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 19 Feb 2007 17:01:18 +0000

Girl 1: “My roommate insists on sleeping with the TV on…she says the flashing puts her to sleep or something”
Girl 2: “Is that, like, an American thing to do?”

—Elevator in the Education Building

In retaliation, American Guy would go to Afghanistan and mistakenly kill two Canadians.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 17:24:03 +0000

American Guy: [Jokingly] Canadians are mostly pussies who’ll believe anything the government tells them. I bet if me and you threw down I’d win solely on the fact that I’m American and you’re Canadian.
Canadian Guy: Oh please. If you and I actually got into a real fight you’d get knock down faster than the Twin Towers.

—Outside Redpath

If by some, you mean all, and by states, you mean provinces, then yeah.

overheardatmcgill — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 02:51:14 +0000

(a bunch of Engineers playing Halo 2)
Engineer 1: You’re raping everyone, man!
Engineer 2: Yeah, I mean, that’s illegal in some states.
Engineer 3: Uh… some?

—Engineering Lounge

Confessions of a Dangerous(ly undereducated) Mind

overheardatmcgill — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 02:38:19 +0000

Girl 1: What’s see-cut (CKUT)? Is that like the McGill channel?
Girl 2: Yeah, I think so.
Girl 1: Why does McGill need a channel? That’s so stupid.
Girl 2: Maybe it’s more of a university channel.
Girl 1: Yeah, it says “University” on that sign.
Girl 2: That’s the street it’s on!

…Girl 1: (later) I can’t believe I’m in American Foreign Policy. I don’t know anything about it. All I know is that Bush is a Republican and he’s President.
…
Girl 1 (later): Everyone here knows so much more about American politics. (minutes pass) We know where to get a nice black cardigan, and some tights.

—AUS Lounge

Like Chomsky, he’s both a renowned political scientist and a cunning linguist.

overheardatmcgill — Thu, 18 Jan 2007 05:11:38 +0000

Professor: “We have recently seen a resurgence of capitalism in the U.S.”
(pauses)
Professor: “Oops, i mean a resurgence of capital punishment. You have to forgive me, I had a long night yesterday. I had to tend to certain vices…”
Professor: (sticks out tongue) “Certain good vices.”
(Class erupts in laughter)
Professor: (blushing) Oh god, I’ve already said too much.

—POLI 345 (International Organizations)

(Ed Note: This is a combination of two similar submissions of the same quote)

Military-Industrial Complex ain’t got nothing on McGill’s Superiority Complex.

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 16 Jan 2007 01:57:15 +0000

Student: Is it true that a McGill professor is working on a bunker-busting bomb?
Professor: Yes, because we have learned that Concordia is up to something in their bunkers
(Class: slight laughter )
Professor: Yes, that is where they are training them to deliver pizza.
(Class: loud laughter and applause)

—POLI 227 (Intro. to Developing Areas), Leacock 132