Overheard At McGill » finals

Although I did learn that a rock hard body in motion stays in motion.

tdomf_9e22f — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 21:49:48 +0000

Girl: I wish I could do physics as well as I can do guys.

-Laird Hall

I Was Gonna Correct The Exam…

tdomf_9e22f — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 03:09:06 +0000

(discussing upcoming exam)

Student: As long as we’re giving relevant responses – it’s 4/20; go get high.
Prof: Best. Thread. Ever.

-WebCT

“But I might be able to sleep my way to an A…”

overheardatmcgill — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 17:05:39 +0000

Girl talking with her friend

Girl: I can’t even flirt my way to a B+ on this test.

–Leacock

Probational Satisfaction…that’s a good thing, right?

tdomf_9e22f — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 23:15:35 +0000

Girl 1: What did you think of the midterm?
Girl 2: It wasn’t easy but it wasn’t hard either, you know what I mean?
Girl 3: Yea totally!
Girl 2:I mean I didn’t even study and I got 40%!

- Campus

You don’t get to write in blood till Grad School.

overheardatmcgill — Sun, 13 May 2007 22:19:05 +0000

Student: Are we only allowed to use pen, or can we use pencil?
Professor: Pen is preferable, but if you run out, pencil is better than writing in blood.
- Anth 204 Final, the Gym

This explains how your 74 paper got curved to an 88

overheardatmcgill — Fri, 11 May 2007 22:36:02 +0000

Girl 1: I’m studying for my history exam.
Girl 2: Yea.
Girl 1: And the primary sources just aren’t helping–it’s like reading a story. And I have to Wikipedia every second word.
Girl 2: And the dates.
Girl 1: YEA.

This one bought me flowers first.

overheardatmcgill — Mon, 07 May 2007 15:06:34 +0000

Girl 1: Ugh, I just got raped by another final.
Girl 2: Seems all you talk about these days is getting sodomized by exams.
Girl 1: Why do you always assume it’s anal?
—Roddick Gates

Opus Dei burned them.

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 22:32:02 +0000

Guy (yelling): Why the FUCK don’t they have the Da Vinci Code here?!

—Redpath Reserves (the day before exams start)

Who will then promptly have me executed for tarnishing the UN’s reputation by instigating the ‘Oil for Weed’ program.

overheardatmcgill — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 22:00:27 +0000

Girl (on cellphone): My life totally sucks right now. I went to an intellectual conference and people were saying smart things and I was asking myself ‘Why can’t I say things like that?’ And I’ve forgotten all essay-writing skills I learned in high school. Ugh, I am like totally ESL right now. Like, what am I doing with my life? I’m not getting into law school, I’m not going to get a position at the UN…. UGH!! I might as well get married to a rich Arabian prince!
- Elevator, apt. on du Parc

“oh, and they suck too”

Alex — Wed, 10 Jan 2007 17:13:44 +0000

Girl1: My exams raped me so hard.
Girl 2: Omigod, my exams raped me harder than the McGill football team.
Stranger: Are you serious!?
Girl 2: Yeah our football team has, like, the worst rep.
- Train, over winter break

“If you are ill or otherwise unable to take this exam due to your health and/or desire to get trashed, please go directly to Health Services.”

overheardatmcgill — Sat, 16 Dec 2006 16:56:18 +0000

Girl on cell phone: “Yeah, I’m in health services”
(pause)
Girl on cell phone: “I just knew that I couldn’t possibly sit through that exam.”
(pause)
Girl on cell phone: “Okay, cool. Â I’ll call you later. Â We’re totally getting shit-boxed tonight! Alright. Â Bye.”
–Health Services Waiting Room, Brown Building

Overheard during Finals, Part 3: Are you SURE you’re at the right university?

overheardatmcgill — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 22:18:50 +0000

Bio Guy 1: Ahh fuck… what the hell is the other example of a Hydrozoa other then hydra.
(Know it all girl starts doing a charade she marches and does the Hitler salute)
Bio Guy 2: How the hell does Hitler have to do with any of it?
Know it all girl: It s a Portuguese man o war !!!
Bio Guy 2: Hitler was German !!
Bio Guy 1: That s right and he exterminated the Portuguese….or was it the polish?
—Molson
__________________________________
Guy giving the explanation: “So the fallopian tubes are where you stick your dick”

— Bio study session

__________________________________

Exam Invigilator: Please place your ID on your desk in front of you. If you are visiting from another university, please place your ID from your home university on your desk.
First year meathead: Why would someone visit from another university to write an exam?
Friend (in shock): Like, on exchange.
First year meathead: (embarassed laughter)
—In the Gym, Natural Disasters Final Exam

___________________________________

Prof:”You have to make sure your definition makes sense. Otherwise, it won’t”
—Math 354

___________________________________

Guy 1: So did you rape that exam like you said you would?
Guy 2: Well I approached it as if I was to rape it, but then it turned out to be a three hundred pound man.
—After MATH 150 exam
__________________________________
Guy 1: So how did the exam go?
Guy 2: Fucked it gently. *motions with pelvis*
—After BIO 111 exam

Overheard during Finals, Part 2: You should PROBABLY get some sleep.

overheardatmcgill — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 17:22:53 +0000

Blonde girl to Friend: “…And so I like totally said to the Prof, like, if I had known there would be this much reading and writing, I totally would have taken a different English class!”
—Leacock Computer Lab

________________________________
Girl #1: It’s so hard to study all day …I have to drink so much coffee.
Girl #2: My drug of choice is crack.
—Tim Hortons, Redpath

_______________________________

[two students deep in conversation at one of the tables. Two pregnant Chinese women waddle by, and the two students go completely silent and stare.]
Girl: Wow, you never see pregnant people at McGill.
Guy: Who’s got the time?
—Tim Hortons, Redpath
________________________________

(boys studying for natural disasters)
“Earth is bomb!!!”
—Molson Common Room
________________________________

dude 1: Hey man, so how was your final?
dude 2: Well, I always wondered what it would be like to get done up the ass with a five inch thick pole. Now I know.
dude 3: Nice.
—outside Leacock

Overheard during Finals, Part 1: You know what, don’t bother showing up.

overheardatmcgill — Wed, 13 Dec 2006 22:38:52 +0000

Girl: So, it says one of my exams is “I-N Department. What does that mean?
Girl 2: (Pause)…it means in the department.
Girl 1: …um…huh? (blank stare)
Girl 2: …in the department the class is in.

___________________________________
(Studying for Calculus final)
Girl 3: Is the prof going to give us one of those weird circle thingys?
Girl 4: The unit circle…?

___________________________________

Security: You cannot enter the library with coffee.
Boy: This is not coffee; this is tea!
Security: Doesn’t matter, you cannot enter with
anything in that cup.
Boy: What if I carry my pens in it?
–Library

___________________________________

“A question about the location; where and what exactly is GYM? I couldn’t find it on the campus map.”
–Econ208

___________________________________

“If you fail the midterm, the oral presentation, the paper, and the final, you fail the term. ”

___________________________________

Guy 1: I may very well spend christmas in a Santa Claus costume with a bottle of jack daniels in my hand…crying.
—Second cup

__________________________________

Math aficionado: I haven’t had time to shower in 2 weeks.
—Burnside Basement

Funny, that’s how I feel about Physics

overheardatmcgill — Tue, 12 Dec 2006 22:54:04 +0000

After a physics exam:
Guy 1: I don’t understand how you can be gay.
Guy 2: What do you mean?
Guy 1: Now that I’ve *experienced* sodomy, I don’t understand how anyone can like it.