Prof: I havn’t felt particularly horny lately, actually.

-Arts Legacy

Girl: [to two guys] I actually thought you two would be Asian, you know, because I heard you were really smart…

-Leacock

Girl: Food, when you’re high, is like porn. It’s just sooo good.

-New Rez Caf

Girl 1: Chances of winning the Tim Hortons free coffee are 1 out of 10
Girl 2: No, my sister said even if you buy 10 you might not win

- SSMU Lounge

Guy #1: Really? McGill has a Quidditch team?!
Guy #2: Yeah, there are tournaments and shit
Guy #1:  But…they don’t actually fly…do they?

Girl 1: Hey, your bag is open.
Girl 2: It’s always open, just like my legs.

- Leacock