Guy 1 : Dude, where is the Pacific Ocean?
Guy 2: Seriously? Like, the biggest ocean in the world?
Guy 1: Yeah, I guess.

-Leacock

Girl: (discussing Inglourious Basterds) Didn’t any, like, historians or whatever, look at it before it was released? I’m pretty sure that’s not what happened.
-New Rez

Librarian: You do not have to cite general knowledge facts that everyone knows, such as that terrorists bombed the Twin Towers on September 11, 2000.

-Leacock 132

Girl: (yelling angrily) Will someone PLEASE tell me what the STUPID Spanish Inqui-frickin-sition is?!

-Leacock

Brunette: I can’t go tomorrow night, I have to go see “JFK.”
Blonde: …But JFK’s dead! Why would you want to see him?
- Outside Werby’s on Parc

ditzy girl: …and then she said that she had a component face!
guy: what??
ditzy girl: You know, like, in science and stuff.
guy: huh?
ditzy girl (getting annoyed): You knowwww…there’s like, little things that swirl around together and make Adam.
guy: You mean Atoms?
ditzy girl: No stupid!! The Garden of Eden.
guy: The Garden of Eden is on your face???
ditzy girl (getting really annoyed): NO idiot! That’s ridiculous. (pauses) It was on HER face.
guy (really confused): What’s your major again?
ditzy girl: Some science thing. I can’t remember
guy: I thought you were taking History?
ditzy girl: Duh!! You are so stupid sometimes. History IS science
guy: (silent)
ditzy girl: I don’t even know why I even bother with you sometimes. How did you get into McGill???
- Outside the McGill bookstore

Girl: Yeah well at least with slavery they give you housing and food. But with unpaid internships, they don’t pay for anything!

—Geo Lounge, Burnside

Girl 1: My boyfriend is really excited about this new movie…300?
Girl 2: Yeah! It looks so cool! It’s about–
Girl 1: Like, bows and arrows and stuff, right?
(Pause)
Girl 2: Well, sure, it’s about this famous battle between Sparta and–
Girl 1: Yeah! My boyfriend is totally into all that…Medieval stuff.

—Roddick Gates

Guy 1: I never get what’s up with all the people wearing Che Guevara shirts?
Guy 2: What did he do anyway?
Guy 1: I don’t know, something in Cuba.

—St Catherine

Blonde Girl: What if the Nazi’s got facebook?
—AUS Lounge