Girl: “Uggghhhh… This soup tastes like semen!”
–Redpath Cafeteria

[Ed Note: Taste the soup! Taste the soup! Taste the soup!, a la Coming to America]

Girl on Cell: Really…? What do you wipe yourself with? A leaf?? A frozen leaf??? That’s so disgusting. That’s why you should always have like a box of tissues.”

–Redpath Basement

“So at what point does CPR become necrophilia?”

– McLennan Library caf

Girl: I’m really wet, you wanna get in my pants?

–Tim Hortons Line, in Redpath Library