Girl (to Cashier): How much data can a 4GB USB fit?

-McGill Bookstore

Prof: Angela Davis will be here on Friday to give a talk… Now, does anyone know who Angela Davis is?

Student: Isn’t that the woman who was raped and killed?

-Adams Auditorium

Girl: It’s like the Rogers people put an electric buzzer up your vagina and it goes off every time you try to call customer service!

- Lower field

Girl: Right before he passed out in the hall he peed on your door.
Boy: There’s only one way to solve this; I’m peeing on his door.
-Molson

Guy: What do you think about euthanasia?
Girl: I think they’re tacky…
Guy: What?
-Schulich Library

Professor: The slaughter industry is the biggest user of tampons in Canada.

-Class

Guy: I feel like a rapist when I open doors with gloves on.

–Leacock

Girl: He was on top of me, and the next thing I know he started to take off his dinosaur suit.

–Arts Building

Guy on the phone, in a serious tone: No, I totally understand you. This is serious, this is war. This is modern fucking war. You know what, we just have to put bacon bits everywhere.

-University and Milton

(Guys in a group)

Guy: So that settles it…women don’t always lactate.

-Trottier