Girl: 7 Kids out of 1000? Jeez What percentage is that?

-Leacock Auditorium

Guy: How do we find out what lab group we are in? Can it be found online?
Girl: Math 139 has labs!!!!!!?????
Prof: This class has no labs.
-Math Discussion Boards

Student 1: (looks at paper) Wait, so what is this? Egyptian?
Student 2: No, actually that’s math…

–Trottier

Nerd: Your friendship is like the limit of 1/x as x approaches 0.
- Macdonald Campus

Accounting professor: Ok take out your calculators, cuz I’m not very good at calculating things
- MGCR211 Intro to Financial Accounting

[Bunch of mathies laughing/studying in Second Cup. The only girl waits for a break in the conversation]
Math Girl: “Ha, yeah. Yeah well that’s just like something my friend told me once. She said she liked her men like tea. Hot, strong, dark and sweet. Heehee.”
(all the boys just look back at their calculators)

—Second Cup

(cell phone goes off with Rihanna’s SOS ringtone)
Prof: …apparently Rihanna is calling.

-Math123 Linear Algebra and Probability

Girl: So, 14+7…. 23.
Guy: Umm, it’s 21. Aren’t you a math major?
Girl: (Angrily) Arithmetic isn’t math!

—Burnside Basement

Student (confused by geometric shape): So, why is it called an astroid?
Prof: Because it’s spaced out!

—MATH 151

Girl 1 (counting second girl’s piercings): 1, 2, 3, 4, and…5!
Girl 2: Nope! Nine! … Find the other 6 (winks)
Girl 1: You mean…the other 4?

—Biol 112, Leacock 132