Prof: [looking at Girl 1] …Are you from the US?
Girl 2: She’s wearing a Roots sweater – why did you think that she was from the US?
Prof: I’m wearing no underwear. Where am I from?

- Leacock

Guy #1: So how are you going to get citizenship in both England and Canada?
Guy #2: I told you, I’m getting dual citizenship. It’s pretty normal.
Guy #1: OHHH. I thought you said jewel citizenship, like some weird British thing.

-Schulich Library

Prof: The three things that Canadians have in common are hockey, a smug sense that the American health care system sucks, and its identity as a peace keeping nation.
Guy: And milk.
Prof: You have to stop bringing up milk, sometimes it fits sometimes it doesn’t.
Girl: That’s what she said.

-McConnell Engineering

Girl 1: What’s the Capital of Alaska?
Girl 2: Anchorage?
Girl 1: Let’s look at the map.
Girl 2: Oh my God, Alaska is attached to Canada!?! I always thought it was an island!

-McConnell

Guy: Why would anyone name a city WATER-LOO??

-Otto Mass

Professor: Do you have any experience in Asia?

Student: Not really… Well, I lived in Vancouver for a little bit.

-Leacock

Girl 1: Where are you from?
Girl 2: Regina.
Girl 1: Ha, yah, we all came from vagina
Girl 3: Actually, I was born from a C-Section
- New Rez

Prof: So, minimal standards of living in Canada are very different to Togo.
Student: What the fuck is Togo?
- ECON 209

American: In Canada you may have free health care, BUT in AMERICA WE HAVE SOCIAL INJUSTICE!
- Greenbriar Rez Common Room

Prof: If you show patients with right parietal cortex damage a map of Canada and ask them to point to Quebec, they will point to the middle of the Atlantic…which is where Quebec should really be.
- ANAT321 Circuitry of the Brain