Girl: I’ve been getting “A”s in my Psych class, which is really good, ’cause I don’t really get “A”s. I’m hardcore dumb.
- English 203

2 girls posing with the James McGill statue.
Girl 1: People are going to think we’re tourists. I do go to this school, you know.
Girl 2: But I’m from Concordia.
Girl 1: So… that doesn’t make you a tourist.
Girl 2: Well, we do live on the South Shore.
- McGill Lower campus

Prof: ..for example, some damselfish populations have only one male. And if the male gets killed, one of the females will transform into a male within hours.
Student: How do you figure out gender on the reef?
Prof: We can tell because all of a sudden they stop asking for directions.
- Stewart

(First off, thanks to all those who’ve stayed with us through the summer. We’ve managed to retain over 60% of our readers for this term. We’re assuming the rest are being held as enemy combatants)

Ever overheard something that O@M-able, but didn’t have access to a computer (or were too lazy to track one down) to submit the gem immediately upon hearing it?

Our newest feature, Submit-By-Phone (courtesy of babyTel.ca), allows you to make an overheard submission just by calling a phone number and leaving a message.

So, all you roaming eavesdroppers, grab your cellphones and store this incredibly easy to remember number:

514-907-3470
(or, 90-PEGS-0. Catchy, we know.)

(We’ve concocted an elaborate mnemonic that inolves 90 peg-legged pirates getting depegged. Ask us about it another
time.)

(Its a incredibly cold outside, 2 guys in winter jackets are in line for a bar. A bit down the street are around 4 gay guys in incredibly tight pink short sleeve t-shirts in a different line.)
Guy 1: Man look!
Guy 2: What?
Guy 1: I’m freezing and I’m in wearing a damn winter coat. What the fuck is wrong with those guys?
Guy 2: Obviously its cause their gay.
Guy 1: Ohhh…
- St. Laurent

Professor: Now, if only I were teaching at HARVARD…
Class: OOHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Professor: No-n-No! I meant it for the MONEY!
- Leacock 132

Prof: …This gentleman, Louis Pasteur, was the person who gained fame for sending cows out into the pasteur to be pasteurized.
Class: (still listening in silence)
Prof: That was a joke…
- Chem 120, Am class

Girl enters class late and slips on wet stairs near the front of class. Class giggles.
Prof: Are you ok?
Girl: Yea, it’s slippery
Prof: No shit
- POLI345

Girl 1: I know for a fact this year is going to be way better than last year.
Girl 2: Why’s that?
Girl 1: Because this year, I actually have designer clothes. Last year I didn’t have any and I was so unhappy!
- Lorne Cres.

3 guys wearing mcgill sweatshirts, presumably roommates, are waiting in line at the registers and are impatiently wondering where the 4th guy is…
Guy 1: where is he?
Guy 2: i know, how long does it take to get cans of the soda he wanted?
(guy 4 returns, empty handed and dejected)
Guy 3: what happened? you couldn’t find them?
guy 4 shakes his head no…
Guy 3: alright, i’ll go help you
(a good 10 minutes pass…they were now at the register and the clerk is ringing up their order and still no sign of guy 3 or guy 4)
Guy 2 to guy 1: wow, remind me never to go shopping here again with both of them
Guy 1: yeah, i know
- Metro on Parc during first week of finals