American Girl: “I don’t know anything about hockey. Who even won the Stanley Cup last year?”
Canadian Girl: “Carolina.”
American Girl: “Carolina? Where’s that?”
Canadian Girl: “Like the state… there’s a North Carolina and a South Carolina”
American Girl: “Wait… the States has teams in the NHL? I thought it was just a Canadian thing!”

–BMH Cafeteria

Guy: I don’t think seven years of bad sex would be that bad…after all, you could still drink, right?

–Upper Rez

(in regards to intruders in rez)
Student: “Well we could get out the baseball bats”
Porter: “Or better yet we take their tonsils out, eh?”
–Upper Rez