Post-Carnival Hungover Girl: Don’t you know what happened to me? I passed out in the RVC study room. I could have been raped!

Girl: “Hey, how much was that eighth you bought last weekend?”
Guy: “Eighth? What’s an eighth? Is it like three-quarters?”

—Plateau

Student: “I am confused by the terms unilineal and bilineal”
Professor: “Well, what does uni mean?”
Student: “I dunno, two?”

— Soc 247

Prof: I don’t do Math; I do people
- EDEC 305

Canadian soldier (twists beret nervously in his hands): Yeah, I’m not really on duty right now; I’m actually going to school… I have to take CALCULUS.
McGill Girl: Really? I don’t have to take calculus.
Canadian soldier (drops beret in shock): That’s not fair!
- PE Trudeau Airport

Prof: In this course, you are going to need to overcome your inherent physical limitations of being three dimensional.
in class (Math 271) – Linear Algebra and Partial Differential Equations