Newfie: Newfies aren’t for kicking…they’re for loving!

—Molson

[Girl opening mail]
Girl: Ambulance bill?? I thought that was a cab….

- Molson

(Stoners walk into a elevator)
Stoned Skinny Girl: I still cant figure out why it makes that sound.
(The skinny girl keeps knocking her fist into her lung. It makes a drum-like sound)
Stoned Skinny Girl: Its almost like my heart is thumping.
Stoned Guy: Maybe its like cause the lung is a cavity or something.
Skinny Stoned Girl: Even if its a cavity why would it make that sound?
(The stoners exit. Still confused)

– Molson Hall Elevator

Girl 1: “im getting warts from the shower”
Girl 2: “like…. genital warts?”

–Molson Bathroom