Girl (to Cashier): How much data can a 4GB USB fit?

-McGill Bookstore

Girl: “It feels like my inner thighs are making love to each other”

- McConnell cafeteria

Girl: I wish I could do physics as well as I can do guys.

-Laird Hall

Guy 1: With so much plastic surgery these days, it’s so hard to tell how old a person is by just looking at them.
Guy 2: If you really wanna know, just look at a person’s hands. You can tell by age spots and wrinkles.
Girl: Not me! When I get older I’m gonna get a hand job!

-New Rez

Girl: How can you have sexual thoughts about Jesus!?!?!

-Aylmer & St. Catherine

Girl: It’s just a research paper so there’s no thought process. Just plagiarism, plagiarism, plagiarism.

-Leacock 26.

Girl: My sister got swine flu…
Guy: Oh yeah?
Girl: … then she passed it to my dog.

-Bronfman

Girl 1: I’m not a fan of the cock.
Girl 2: …..excuse me?
Girl 1: You know. The Cock. Cockiness. In guys?
Girl 2: *stares in awe*

- Adams Auditorium

Professor: What population has a high rate of myopia?
Student: Nerds?

-Leacock

Girl 1: Hey do you want to revise for chem tomorrow?
Girl 2: I can’t, I’m going to the procastination workshop at 2.

-Leacock