Student: “I am confused by the terms unilineal and bilineal”
Professor: “Well, what does uni mean?”
Student: “I dunno, two?”

— Soc 247

Newfie: See, in Newfoundland, we call AIDS “the hiv” and we assume that all homosexuals have it…and therefore avoid them.
Non-newfie: …dude, that’s fucking terrible.
Newfie: Well, I didn’t say that’s what I believe, but that’s how everybody else there feels.

— St. Catherine

(Two girls walking together)
Girl 1 (to her friend as she’s laughing): “Her dad, like, wants me. It’s gross!”

— Milton

Girl in the hall: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh
(pauses)
…facebook!!
- Molson

“If I look through my beer glass, she looks kind of pretty.”
- Brutopia

Girl: Wait, you take french?
Guy: Yeah
Girl: But you have a french last name.
- Molson

Prof: Aliens have a different biochemical composition, because they have a different evolution, and so we would be very indigestible to them.
- BIOL 112

“Wait…so what is a GPA?”

- Adams Aud. waiting for class to start

Geek: “I didn’t mean to get a Wii, actually. It just kind of… happened.”
- Trottier lobby

Girl: So how do you like your professor?
Guy: He’s okay. He speaks in full sentences.
- outside Leacock 132