Girl: You’ll always be my VP External!
(Handsome) Boy: Thanks baby, I can be your VP Internal if you want me to be
Girl: EWW!
- Douglas 

Girl: Is it in class?
Prof: Is what in class?
Girl: The in-class test.
- RELG 207

Guy: We’re taking it back, I’m putting the rape back in diplomatic relations.

—SSMU Lounge

[Prof is doing a colonialism simulation it incldues a girl and a boy pretending to be married farmers.]
Prof: Okay, go on and farm.
[The boy and the girl go to the front, and sit down on the steps of the stage.]
Prof: Stand up, you can’t farm sitting down!
[The two students stand up, and just stand there doing nothing.]
Prof (To boy): Come on, farm! Use your hoe!

–Intro to Developing Areas 

Girl 1: “So, let’s hang out over winter break”
Girl 2: “Wait, aren’t you going home to the West Island?”
Girl 1: “…What?”
Girl 2: “You live on the West Island..wouldn’t taking a presumably long ferry ride to hang out with me for a couple of hours be a waste, even though I am worth it?”
Girl 1: “…WEST OF THE MONTREAL ISLAND”
Girl 2: “MONTREAL IS AN ISLAND? WHAAAAT?”

–Outside Peterson Hall

Girl 1: the only thing I don’t like about living out of rez is that I have to do dishes all the time
Guy 1: Whatever. I usually just lick stuff clean.

–Arts building

(Guy says something clever)
Girl: OMG you’re so smart!
Guy: That’s right. I use my coconut [points at head]
Girl: a coconut?! WHERE?!
(Guy rolls eyes)
Girl: OH you mean your head!

—New Rez

Girl 1: And she’s TOTALLY a virgin!
Girl 2 (incredulously): Really?
Girl 1: Or I could be totally making that up. But still!

—McConnell Engineering, Stairwell

Guy 1 (Giving Out Flyers): “Freezing for tuition freeze”
Guy 2: “What? This place is already cheaper than daycare!”

—Between Arts and McConnell

Girl (to guy): “I waited in line for an hour, and got frostbite on all of my clothes!”

–Milton