Guy: …so if you win, you get a free trip to Chicago, and if you win in Chicago, you get a free trip to Israel.
Girl: GOD!!! You Jews and your free trips. I need to invest myself in a religion so I can go traveling too!
- McTavish

(Ed. Note: This is the first time someone has ever submitted a quote that overheard me (I’m ‘Guy’))

Guy: Oh My God that girl has a HUGE ass, but I love it.
- Astrobiology seminar

Prof: Now, I don’t want to alarm you, but what I am really trying to say here is if you like sex… watch out.
- BIOC 212

Girl 1: Ron Paul? Isn’t he a porn star?
Girl 2: Nope, that’s Ron Jeremy.
- Outside of New Rez

Guy 1: Why you bending over like that?
Guy 2: Oh just stretching up for the vicious rape that is the midterm.
- Bronf 151

Girl: OH MY GOD, Heath Ledger died!
Guy: HOLY SHIT, REALLY?! Thank God they finished filming The Dark Knight in time.
- Outside the McGill Gym

Girl: I’m so tired I think I’m gonna kill myself.
Guy: (Walking away) Alright, gimme a call.
- Outside Burnside Hall

Girl1: So now I’m wondering if I’m pregnant, or just getting fat…
Girl2: Oh my god, I hope you’re pregnant, at least then you can get an abortion!
- BMH

Girl 1: Don’t worry. She’s your friend. Of course she’s going to forgive you for sleeping with her boyfriend. It’s what friends do.
Girl 2: Yeah… thanks. You’re probably right. I wonder if he’s busy tonight.
- University St.

Guy: You know, with long hair, when you see a homeless person you feel like you can really relate to them. You Know? It’s like saying ‘I can relate. I can feel you, I’m on your side.’
- New Rez