Guy: Why would anyone name a city WATER-LOO??

-Otto Mass

Girl: Do I have nut skin in my teeth?

-McGill Bookstore

Girl: If I came back and my egg was gone, I would punch the crap out of my penguin husband.

-Outside Otto Maass

Guy: Yeah, i got her a fucking heart-shaped box of chocolate and shit.
Girl: Aww, that’s so romantic.

-Campus

Librarian: “Just start milking the bibliographic cow.”

-HIST 396

(Prof is discussing how the world is “getting smaller” due to technology)

Girl 1: Wait, why is the world getting smaller?
Girl 2: I don’t know; Global Warming or something…

-Leacock

Girl: (asks forcefully) What about the rights of the mother?

Guy: Easy there, feminist…

-Leacock

(Guys in a group)

Guy: So that settles it…women don’t always lactate.

-Trottier

Girl: (yelling angrily) Will someone PLEASE tell me what the STUPID Spanish Inqui-frickin-sition is?!

-Leacock

Guy: I hug you and all I get is head.

- outside Wong