Guy 1: So what are you in?
Girl: Physiology but I’m taking physics and anatomy.
Guy 2: Shit! So you get to go to the morgue and stuff?
Girl: Yea! I love it!
Guy 1: Do you have to touch their privates?!?
—Roddick Gates

(Rich girl from nyc realizing she’s rich)

Rich Girl from NYC: But like I know a lot of poor people, Im just not friends with them.

Stupid Girl 1: Ew all the beer and food this weekend, I swear I gained 10 lbs.
Stupid Girl 2: I know, I think I’ll fast tomorrow.

—New Rez Cafe

Girl 1:And my boyfriend told me what a bad person I was, and I was like, ‘don’t say that to me, you’re hurting my feelings.’ Then I did drugs and cried all day
Girl 2: Wow, well we should really study today
Girl 1: Yeah, lets stay really late, like till 10.
Girl 2: (totally serious) Yeah, or we can go to the biosphere and get burgers
Girl 1: (totally serious) Yeah

—Leacock elevator

(One Orthodox Jewish guy carrying a cello case and another orthodox guy carrying a trombone case)
Orthodox Guy with Cello Case: “They let you play with dogs in Vegas!”
–Outside McClennan

Guy 1: So I guess they’re selling coffee and samosas or whatever in that hallway in McConnell again.
Guy 2: Oh yeah? That’s usually pretty cheap… hey, is it for charity?
Guy 1: Yeah, I think so.
Guy 2: Oh. Well, fuck that, then.
Guy 1: Seriously.

—Trottier

Girl (on cell phone): “You can’t marry him, he’s a crack dealer!”

—McLennan Library

Girl 1: Lately, it feels like I’m on fire when I have sex.
Girl 2: That’s what happened when I had gonorrhoea.
Guy (at next table over): Wow, those girls were pretty hot before I heard that… I have to stop eavesdropping.

—BMH

“… and she said, ‘Stop doing that or you’re going to get gonorrhea in your throat!”

—outside of the McGill Metro stop

Girl 1: Hey guys, guess what, today is Pi Day!
Girl 2: Oh yeah, cuz its 3/14! Nice!
Girl 3: Isn’t there another one of those holidays..like a pot one?
Girl 2: Yeah, its April 20th
Girl 1: Why 4/20?
Girl 2: Some smokers in California used to always get high at 4:20 in the afternoon.
Girl 1: That’s so cool! OMG, imagine how fun it’ll be when the year is 1420!
Girl 2: *pause* 1420 already happened…

—New Rez