[A guy and girl speedwalk past...]
Guy (loudly and indignantly): “But you don’t want to have sex, you just want to sleep in my bed!!”

—Outside of MacLennan Library

Girl 1: “im getting warts from the shower”
Girl 2: “like…. genital warts?”

–Molson Bathroom

[at a crosswalk]

Inexperienced Pedestrian#1: Watch! Once that light turns red, the OTHER light will turn green at the SAME TIME!
[lights change]
IP#1: SEE?!
IP#2: Wow, COOL!

–Place Des Arts

Girl 1: Okay, would you rather have a baby, or eat a baby?
Girl 2: Eat a baby, definitely!

—Roddick Gates

Frustrated girl 1: URGH I have a midterm AND a paper!
Frustrated girl 2: I have herpes.
–Arts Lobby

Guy in ironic t shirt:  “I’m not pretentious, I just have really good taste in music.”

—Arts Steps

Guy: “Am I going to have to flash some dick?”
—AUS Lounge

Professor: “If I have a tree, I don’t just go around and say, I’ll trade this tree for a woman’s… lacy… thing…”
[Moments later]
Professor: “Yes, trees and underwear. Don’t quote me on that!”

–Econ 208

male froshleader: dude, did you just pinch my nipple?
male froshie: uhhhhhhh

–outside of Peel Pub

Guy (to friends): “Man, I am so obsessed with goat girls.”

–Arts Lounge