Guy 1: You hate everyone at McGill
Guy 2: What the fuck, no i don’t..
Guy 1: Ya you do. If Jesus Christ was alive, you’d probably think he was cocky for being the son of God

—Roddick Gates

“Why the FUCK would you ever date a deaf guy?”

—Douglas

(Guy sitting at bar drinking out of a pitcher at Biftek)

Bartender: Um, Sir, would you please drink out of a beer mug?
Guy: Naw its okay i’m fine with the pitcher.
Bartender: No, Sir, its for sanitary reasons, we don’t wash the pitchers.
Guy’s girlfriend: Eew get a mug.
Guy: Naw it’s okay, I’m almost done.

—Biftek

Girl: How do you spell ‘president’?

—Gardner Hall, during the Open House

Girl: I’m taking Italian Culture, doing a research project, and an Oncology class.
Guy 1: Oh, oncology is fascinating, isn’t it.
Guy 2: Yeah…the female anatomy is pret…ty…interesting.
(Awkward Silence)
Guy 1: Uhhhhhh, you’re thinking of…gynecology.

—St. Laurent Second Cup

(3 girls chatting on the blue couches; kinda-feminist girl has to sell tickets to the Vagina Monologues)
kinda-feminist girl: You guys should come see the Vagina Monologues.
other girl: Mmmm, I think it’s too feminist for me.
kinda-feminist girl: (slightly sarcastic) Oh OK then why don’t you just go have children and live in your kitchen?
other girl: Haha. Well, still I might walk out of the play feeling like I don’t have to shave my legs anymore.

—Shatner lounge

Girl 1: Peace, love and understanding is my favourite song!
Girl 2: [laughs] Yeah, I can relate to that. I don’t think police understand me either!

—Milton and Parc

Girl: He was going to announce how I had a sex dream about my brother when I was like twelve.

Guy: Yeah, but it’s different dreaming it than if you actually WANT to.

—Gert’s

Girl: I can’t believe it! I’m in Canada and I can’t get ice!

—RVC Caf

Guy (to his friend) :Sometimes I feel like a stripper preaching to a nun

—McConnell Engineering